Q: How do crazy runners go through the forest?
A: They take the psycho path.
Q: Why was the blonde jogging backwards?
A: She wanted to gain weight!
Q: Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato?
A: The lettuce was a "head" and the tomato was trying to "ketchup"!
Q: What do you call a 13 year old girl from Kentucky who can run faster than her six brothers?
A: A virgin.
Q: How do you know when you've married a running enthusiast?
A: When you have more running clothes than regular clothes in your laundry pile.
Q: Who is the fastest runner of all time?
A: Adam, because he came first in the human race!
Q: If twenty monkeys run after one banana, what time is it?
A: Twenty after one!
Q: What do you get when you run in front of a car?
A: TIRED
Q: What do you call a free treadmill?
A: Outside.
Q: What do you get when you run behind a car?
A: EXHAUSTED
Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?
A: Run! She's got a hand grenade in her mouth.
Q: Why doesn't Mexico have a competitive Olympic team?
A: Because everybody who can run, jump and swim are already in the United States
Q: Why did the chicken run across the road?
A: There was a car coming.
Q: Why can't you let a jogger be a potential juror?
A: Because you'll have a runaway jury.
Q. What's the difference between the Arizona Cardinals & the Taliban?
A. The Taliban has a running game.
Q: Why do dogs run in circles?
A: Because its hard to run in squares!
Q: If I cut Usain Bolt what am I?
A: A boltcutter.
Q: How do you know your a dedicated runner?
A: When your treadmill has more miles on it than your car.
Q: Why do runners go jogging early in the morning?
A: They want to finish before their brain figures out what they're doing.
Q: If runners get athlete's foot what do astronauts get?
A: Mistletoe?
Q: Why did the vegetarians stop running cross country?
A: They didn't like meets!
Q: Did you hear about the marathon runner who ran for three hours but only moved two feet?
A: He only had two feet!
Q: What is absolute jealousy?
A: The feeling you get when you're driving in your car and pass runners.
Q: Why can't you take a nap during a race?
A: Because if you snooze, you lose!
Q: What's the hardest thing about running cross country?
A: Telling your parents that your gay!
Q: What race is never run?
A: A swimming race.
Q: What do you call running while listening to your favorite rapper?
A: A Snoop Jogg.
Q: What does a runner drink when she is in last place?
A: Ketchup.
Q: How did the barber win the foot race?
A: He took a short cut.
Q: Why did the trainer want her client to work out where it was sunny?
A: So she would feel the burn.
Q: What do you call a competitive runner who just broke up with his girlfriend?
A: Homeless
Q: What kind of running shoes are made from banana skins?
A: Slippers.
Q: What do runners do when they forget something?
A: They jog their memory
Q: What do a dentist and a track coach have in common?
A: They both use drills!