How many Letsrun outlaws have pooped on someone else's property?

I grew up in Northeast Ohio and around there, exists a place called Quaker Steak & Lube. They have the most ungodly spicy hotwings ever created by man. You literally have to sign a disclaimer before you are served them, because they can easily blister your mouth when you eat them. Me, being the hardass that I am, happily sign the waiver and proceed to chomp down 6 of these wings. I get my name up on the wall for having done it, and leave the place in pain, but feeling proud.

The next morning I decide to go for my morning 5 mile run along Mayfield Rd. (some of you in the cleveland area may know where this is). Its a well traveled area, lots of cars most of the day driving along. Residences with front lawns, trees etc.... your typical suburban setting. Well I get the familiar gotta shit real bad stirring in my abdomen about halfway into the run, and its an out and back run, so I'm not that close to home. It didn't seem too bad initially so I just kept running, and thought I'd make it just fine. Well those nuclear hotwings from the night before had a different idea. I swear the next tenth of a mile was out of a science fiction movie. The wings moved through me like a f***ing bullet train through the Chunnel and I knew I wasn't going to make it. I stop to walk, and look for a place to hide and let loose, but the particular area I was in just had houses with big front lawns and no particular landscaping. At this point, the alien in my ass was sprinting for the finish line, and it was so bad, I couldn't even move, lest I shit myself right there on the sidewalk in front of a hundred soccer moms sipping their morning lattes. I shuffle step onto the lawn of a particular house in a feeble attempt to make it to the bushes directly in front of their house, but it was too late. Feeling the overspiced rocket of mud in my ass about to burst forth, I quickly and frantically pull down my running shorts to clear the path. I was about a half second too slow, as I do this the shit blows out of my ass, into my shorts which are now around my ankles, all over my hands, running watch, and forearms, and some onto the front lawn of this house.

So here I am, 9am, people driving by, slowing down, honking with a shocked and disgusted look on their face.....and I'm standing in the middle of someone's front lawn with nothing on me except my shit riddled running shorts.

Thank god I had a t-shirt on that morning because it was my only saving grace. I leave the shorts in the middle of the lawn, take off my t-shirt so that I'm now standing completely butt ass naked in front of probably a hundred commuters as I wipe my liquid shit off my own hands and arms with my t-shirt. Now, I have to get home. So I tie the shit stained t-shirt around myself like a loincloth from hell, and f***ing TAKE OFF. I swear to god I ran the last two miles back home faster than Daniel Komen on cocaine.

I didn't bother to return to the house later to clean up the little present I left in the dead center of their yard, I was WAY too embarrassed. I didn't run that route for about a month afterwards. I don't know if all that qualifies as immature or not, but there really was nothing I could do. Thankfully I live a far far way from there now, and I will never eat those godawful wings at Quaker Steak and Lube again.

I've pooped on property owned by New York City Parks Department.

twice for me in parks after dark...made it to the bathrooms both times but they are always locked at night to keep out the homeless. so into the trees/bushes i went

You'd be collecting your teeth off the ground if you did it on my property.

This story is hilarious. Your descriptions are great. Thanks for the laugh.

Done it a few times. When nature calls, you gotta go!

this is completely understandable. The home owner must not be a runner. If you do the same run, at the same time everyday, you will have to poop at the same time and place. Further if she pooped there once and there is no issue, why not keep doing it?

My favorite was crapping behind a church, wiping my butt with my undies (I was young and didn't realize you don't need to wear undies when you run), and throwing my undies underneath the storage shed behind the church.

Would you say the same thing if it was a homeless person? If you live in a city, there are plenty of actual toilets you can find. I could maybe see doing this if she was in the middle of nowhere, but not next to someone's house, especially several times.

Yeah, I had to jump into the shrubbery next to a house once. Soundsd like a potato cannon, but it was a clean dump.

I pooped on gas station's property just today.

My infamous too many nectarines run. Anyone who runs on the lakefront in Chicago knows where the chess pavilion is, well just west of there are some electric transformer boxes. It was such a movement I couldn't make it to the beach house. I got between the boxes and cut loose. God help anyone who came across the remnants of that, they would have thought a gorilla was out of the zoo.

You people are uncouth, vile, animals.

I pooped in my friend's neighbor's yard once when I was 9

I hate when this happens to me. Not even the poop thread made me smile.

this thread is worthless without pics.

One time I had to run off the path and into the woods to relieve myself. Just as I was cleaning myself up I hear something rustling in the leaves behind me. Afraid it was a snake I turned around to see a big black beetle running like crazy for the steaming pile of dung. It dives right in and quickly disappears into the pile. I have never seen anything so bizarre in the wild. I guess I made his day.

Are bowel movements inherently arousing? I just kept watching that girl from the FOX news report video over, and over...