Do you have to be married to be a marriage counselor?

What a dumb analogy, an appropriate one would be "You have to have a body to be a doctor" because doctors treat problems with bodies, just like marriage counselors treat marriage problems.

That analogy works against her, dumb bitch.

No, you definitely don't have to be married to be a marriage counselor. You might have a bit more credibility with your patients, but technically you just need the academic credentials to be one.

Nope, friend of mine is one, and he is not married.

Bothers him tho, he's embarrassed about it.

I know why he isn't married, he's too anal, picky and hyper.

Otherwise he is a very nice guy.

Expert-Schmexpert wrote:

So what do you all think? Do you have to be married to be a marriage counselor? A parent to write a parenting book? A runner to write a book on running?

There is a very large difference between some schmuck writing a book about something and being a licensed counselor. Anyone can do the former; years of schooling are required for the latter.

Do you have to be mentally ill to be a psychiatrist?

Wait, maybe that's a bad analogy.

Frasier Crane wrote:

Funny that you would use the word "anal" to describe a hetrosexual unmarried guy. Hahaha.

Get Real Real wrote:

Nope, friend of mine is one, and he is not married.

Bothers him tho, he's embarrassed about it.

I know why he isn't married, he's too anal, picky and hyper.

Otherwise he is a very nice guy.

In this case it is appropriate; he's totally hetero, I know his ex-girlfriend, and he made like a heat seeking missile after a hot lady friend of mine.

He is good looking, successful, but he is too hyper in his approach to women, too eager, then end up thinking he is needy and a pest; which maybe, he is...

I feel sorry for him, he actively WANTS to be married, he doesn't want to nail a ton of broads, but he keeps putting women off and doesn't get it...

I think your all missing the point, this person said what do you think not what do you know. I personally believe you SHOULD be married to be a marriage councellor, who better to know how a marriage works then someone who has been married. Just because you have a degree doesnt mean you have experience, it just means your book smart. A girl i know has only ever had one boyfriend and that lasted all of six months, she has had several flings, more than i can count on both hands and feet, and she thinks she is qualified to tell people how their relationship should work. Just because you CAN be a marriage councellor doesnt mean you SHOULD be one.

Your post has made me think that being married might actually be a weakness. If you're applying knowledge from your OWN marriage to every couple you see, you're going to make a lot of mistakes, because different people's marriages are incredibly different. You can't necessarily apply knowledge from one couple to another, because it may not work for them at all.

Good marriage counselors CAN be married, of course, as long as they can see the diverse aspects of people's behavior that influence their relationships and don't just assume that what works for them will automatically work for every couple they see. But if you're trying to guide someone else based on your own relationship, you'll probably be leading them down the wrong path a majority of the time.

Shayhalo wrote:

I think your all missing the point, this person said what do you think not what do you know. I personally believe you SHOULD be married to be a marriage councellor, who better to know how a marriage works then someone who has been married. Just because you have a degree doesnt mean you have experience, it just means your book smart. A girl i know has only ever had one boyfriend and that lasted all of six months, she has had several flings, more than i can count on both hands and feet, and she thinks she is qualified to tell people how their relationship should work. Just because you CAN be a marriage councellor doesnt mean you SHOULD be one.

I think by far more important is the ability to mediate, and the necessary listening/communication skills to facilitate the resolution of conflicts among two people.

Successful marriages look very different depending on the couple involved. There is no model to follow, or to teach. Somebody that drew too much from their own situation (marriage) rather than listening to the situation of those being counseled would suck as a counselor.

It might be another tool to use, but I don't see why it would be necessary.