Here's to healing up everyone!
Every hear of the Stanford Marshmallow Study?
Stanford University psychology researcher Michael Mischel demonstrated how important self-discipline (the ability to delay immediate gratifiction in exchange for long term goal achievement) is to lifelong success? In a longitudinal study which began in the 1960s, he offered hungry 4-year-olds a marshmallow, but told them that if they could wait for the experimenter to return after running an errand, they could have two marshmallows.
Those who could wait the fifteen or twenty minutes for the experimenter to return would be demonstrating the ability to delay gratification and control impulse.
About one-third of of the children grabbed the single marshmallow right away while some waited a little longer, and about one-third were able to wait 15 or 20 minutes for the researcher to return.
Years later when the children graduated from school, the differences between the two groups were dramatic: the resisters were more positive, persistent in the face of difficulties, and able to delay gratification in pursuit of their goals. They had the habits of successful people which resulted in more successful marriages, higher incomes, greater career satisfaction, better health, and more fulfilling lives than most of the population.
Those having grabbed the marshmallow were more stubborn and indecisive, mistrustful, less self-confident, and still could not put off gratification. This impulse followed them throughout their lives and resulted in unsucessful marriages, low job satisfaction and income, poor health, and frustrating lives.
Now I'm not sure I believe all this! What happened to living in the moment - going for it when the chance is there? I'm interested in hearing what you women say about this....
This was on my mind this weekend. I ran a trail race after 7 years of no racing. I was up against some pretty awesome competition, but in my favor was - I have run this trail for 20 years and I know it like the back of my hand!
There are spots where you can run and let it fly, and spots where you have to granny shuffle because of the terrain, the sharp cuts, etc.
Knowing that...I was the impulsive marshmallow girl, and when I could get clear run of the marshmallow, I ran as hard as I could. When the treacherous parts came, I ran it conservatively (you know me and falling go hand in hand!).
All the while, on the open parts I knew there was a chance the final mile and a half (it was 20k overall) would be hell, as it was all UPHILL! But I shoved that damn marshmallow in my mouth whenever I could, I used my capital when it spent well, there was no tomorrow!
Well, the final mile was hell hell, and I saw a friend standing there, who enjoyed laughing at me while I blurted out a couple of four letter words.....my rusty time overall was satisfactory, I won the master's, I finished very high overall males and females. My impulsive racing instincts were there. I've never been a patient runner, I've always been the one stuffing in the marshmallow while the bigger kids were patient....
I've waited a long time to race, I'm no spring chicken these days - no way I was going to waste all that instant gratification - I was taking what I could when I could. The day was beautiful and glorious and who says that being impulsive doesn't pay off?