Rachel Schneider Smith miscarriage at 4 months

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2 years ago 04/10/2022 6:22pm EDT

This is a heartbreaker for any parent. Per her Instagram:

View this post on Instagram
Instagram

Instagram:www.instagram.com/p/CcLuIVuPQP6/

We didn’t have the good fortune of meeting you but, Baby girl Smith, you taught us so much about love & loss and we know you’ll live on in our hearts forever.
About a month ago was the most emotionally, mentally & physically painful experience of my life. Right after celebrating being 15 weeks pregnant I started experiencing some bad cramps and ended up in the ER. Our hearts shattered as we learned the devastating news that there was no heartbeat and I would soon miscarry. One day later, I did. The whole thing felt like a crazy nightmare.
I wanted to share this because I’ve realized this type of heartbreak is unfortunately all too common, not commonly shared, and can leave people with feelings of isolation and deep despair. Sending love to anyone going through hard things - I hope you never feel alone, know it’s okay to not be okay, & make space for some extra self-care💛
While I’m still riding the waves that sometimes come with loss & grief - I feel so lucky to have been so held, loved and supported through every step. I’ve also felt constantly reminded of and consoled by our shared humanity, the beauty of empathy, and the power of seeing hope, gratitude and connection as centering lights in challenging times🙏✨

2 years ago 04/10/2022 6:57pm EDT

re: Makes Paper

2 years ago 04/10/2022 7:00pm EDT

re: Makes Paper

So sorry to hear about the this. 😔

2 years ago 04/10/2022 9:01pm EDT

re: Makes Paper

Sad. And only two months after her skin cancer scare.

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2 years ago 04/10/2022 9:22pm EDT

I dont get it wrote:
I don’t know much about women, but I always imagined this was an event women didn’t like to broadcast to the world. Interestingly, social media has given people a platform to divulge very private information. Strange how the world changes.

She explains well why she shared it in the IG post. If everyone keeps this sort of heartbreaking news to themselves they can feel alone, isolated and despondent.

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2 years ago 04/11/2022 6:11am EDT

Two sides to every story. My sister never shared she miscarried with us. Only came out after there was another scare in the family. These issues are personal and sharing is an individual decision. I do agree that social media does change behavior. Would she have called the local papers and told them to print? Would she have shared so broadly pre-sm? The other personal decision point is exercising while pregnant. My wife was an Olympic Trials chaser and shut it all down while pregnant, yet some girls keep cranking out 60-80 mile weeks while 8 months pregnant. Blows my mind what they are capable of doing but always wonder if there is a "best" practice. These things have no firm answers. My heart breaks for her as I know how much this impacted my sister. She has never really gotten over it although she has three healthy kids now. All the best.

2 years ago 04/11/2022 8:54am EDT

re: JonnyEx

JonnyEx wrote:
Two sides to every story. My sister never shared she miscarried with us. Only came out after there was another scare in the family. These issues are personal and sharing is an individual decision. I do agree that social media does change behavior. Would she have called the local papers and told them to print? Would she have shared so broadly pre-sm? The other personal decision point is exercising while pregnant. My wife was an Olympic Trials chaser and shut it all down while pregnant, yet some girls keep cranking out 60-80 mile weeks while 8 months pregnant. Blows my mind what they are capable of doing but always wonder if there is a "best" practice. These things have no firm answers. My heart breaks for her as I know how much this impacted my sister. She has never really gotten over it although she has three healthy kids now. All the best.

Social media followers are a far more targeted audience than the local paper. If you follow someone you presumably care a bit about their life and regardless of how some men (it’s always men) can’t handle talk of something like a misscarriage, it can have a huge impact on a woman’s life. So as another poster pointed out, empathy is the correct feeling to have here or follow those sage words about not saying anything at all.

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2 years ago 04/11/2022 9:34am EDT

SDSU Aztec wrote:
I dont get it wrote:
I don’t know much about women, but I always imagined this was an event women didn’t like to broadcast to the world. Interestingly, social media has given people a platform to divulge very private information. Strange how the world changes.
Maybe it’s a generational thing but I also consider something like that should only be shared with friends and family.

Says a man, who this did not happen to.

Things like infertility and miscarriage are more common than many think. If people are comfortable sharing something intensely personal, it can help others not feel alone in their grief, avoid feelings that it is their fault, etc. Kudos to Smith for her openness.

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