Today's male rocks stars sing in a high voice, autotuned, wearing skinny pants and women's clothes. They worry about pronouns and eat vegan meals.
Compare this to actual male role model rock stars of the past who chain smoked marlboros, wore leather jackets and torn clothes, had sex with a different woman every night and were frequently thrown in jail.
Sounds like Motley Crue - one of ny favorite hard rock bands of all time.
They're still performing & kicking butt well into their 60's & are on tour right now.🤘
In fact, I'm a Vince Neil follower & being a boomer widower on the prowl - I'm trying to look like him with the hairstyle, goatee & all (minus the weight of course).
Vince, Nikki Six & Tommy Lee have had probably more women in thier lives than all the posters put to together on this site has.
Here they are performing "Girls, Girls, Girls" at the NFL draft: 🤘 🙌 💯
I think we lack diversity of role models and opportunities for children and adolescents to explore and discover who they are. Stereotypical masculine and feminine traits are spectra; the extreme masculine ends are dominated by men, and the extreme feminine ends by women, but there's many distributions in between. I have some highly masculine traits, and some highly feminine traits. I'm competitive and take risks, but I'm also extremely empathetic, and I consider all of these to be strengths. I think men need to stop trying to be whatever idealization they have of a man, and instead try to be the best version of themselves, whether or not it conforms to typical gender roles. Take care of yourself, physically, and mentally, and try to leave things a little better than you found them.
TL;DR be yourself, get really good at being yourself, don't be a jerk
Is there any personality trait desirable for men but not for women (and vice versa)?
This is a genuine question, BTW.
Im not sure there are any that are universal. It’s always going to depend on the social context or individual preference. Whether or not a trait is desirable I think has more to do with one’s role in society rather than gender per se. So probably in some segments of society where roles are highly correlated with sex or gender, there will be a similar correlation of desirable traits to sex or gender. It’s a really interesting question, and I’m still thinking about it.
I wish someone told me that career/financial success was actually a turn off to men. Every man *thinks* he likes a successful woman, but they don't like the traits that inevitably go with it: working late, tired sometimes, can't just take vacations with him whenever he feels like it, difficult to find time to do things like have perfect hair and nails and clothes.
I thought I was lucky to have a good career and a hot runner body. Men like the hot runner body part. They like the career stuff at first, especially successful men, who see you as a relatable human - the sort they might be friends with. And I'm not some boss b*tch, I'm a really nice person.
But as time goes on they realize it's not what they want in a girlfriend or wife. They want someone who can be there for them and their needs. They eventually friend zone me and findsome sweet dumb girl who flatters their ego until they get a ring then they stop putting out.
I'd give up all my success to have a nice boyfriend/husband. I don't think it's ever going to happen. Men suck.
I wish someone told me that career/financial success was actually a turn off to men. Every man *thinks* he likes a successful woman, but they don't like the traits that inevitably go with it: working late, tired sometimes, can't just take vacations with him whenever he feels like it, difficult to find time to do things like have perfect hair and nails and clothes.
I thought I was lucky to have a good career and a hot runner body. Men like the hot runner body part. They like the career stuff at first, especially successful men, who see you as a relatable human - the sort they might be friends with. And I'm not some boss b*tch, I'm a really nice person.
But as time goes on they realize it's not what they want in a girlfriend or wife. They want someone who can be there for them and their needs. They eventually friend zone me and find some sweet dumb girl who flatters their ego until they get a ring then they stop putting out.
I'd give up all my success to have a nice boyfriend/husband. I don't think it's ever going to happen. Men suck.
Women dont like me as a successful man either. They're just blind. In fact, no one cares about me at all. From the societal lens, I am just another face in the crowd here on this earth. Almost invisible.
I am in my 30s and essentially live a dream lifestyle. I am self made, empathetic, polite, caring and I go out of my way to do a lot for others in the community. I am not god's gift to women but I am content with how I look and feel. I am not unattractive. I love to run and swim. Blue eyes, dark hair, tan skin, fit and a ~200k salary (a lot where I am from). I dont wear my salary on my sleeve but I outearn most everyone in the locale.
The women here give me glances, passively flirt but none of them actually step up even though I show interest. Ive had a few gals over the past three months approach me for one night stands or hookups and I simply cant bring myself to do that. I wont just give myself away Sometimes the gals I form crushes on end up with total losers and it's sad to see. It makes me think "WTF".
I am upset to be alone and upset because I am lonely.
maybe this is a troll...or maybe you are sad and lonely.
women approach you frequently for one night stands? I find that hard to believe. i've had plenty of one night stands but I've never approached a man for one. It was always the other way around.
How do you know they want a one night stand? Maybe they are shy and getting drunk is the only way they know how to approach a man. If that happens, talk to them, find out if you like them, be a gentleman and get their number. Then continue the flirtation and if you still like them ask them on a date. Both men and women are lost, including the women looking for one night stands.
Motley Crew wore make up, teased their hair high used Aquanet by the case, and wore spandex tights. Not exactly the description of a macho man.
That is definitely true with them in the 80's & 90's.
They were part of that "hair band" revolution that was very popular with the women back then (e.g. Van Halen, Bonjovi, Brittany Fox, etc. In fact, I dated a women back then who was in love with Eddie Van Halen & couldn't stop talking about him. Lol).
The Crue transitioned away from those hair band costumes around early 2000's. Vince here in a 2005 concert - now that's a "macho man"
Recorded live on June 4, 2005 at Rock am Ring, Nürburgring, Nürburg, Germany.Setlist:Shout At The DevilLive WireWild SideLouder Than HellGirls, Girls, GirlsD...
Christine Emba is an opinion columnist and author based in Washington. Biography Emba grew up in Virginia, and attained a Bachelor of Arts in public and international affairs at Princeton University. Emba was raised as an eva...
An idiot take made by an idiot on LR. Are you surprised?
Men aren't lost. They're just finally being confronted with the reality that they'll need to do more than just show up in order to find love and be successful, and it's basically the first time ever where that's been true.
There have been generations where only 1 in every 13 males managed to reproduce for every female that passed on her genes. Women historically are the definition of "just exist" to be sexually successful. What you're complaining about was one of the first time that sexual equality in mating and reproduction was ever even approached.
An idiot take made by an idiot on LR. Are you surprised?
Men aren't lost. They're just finally being confronted with the reality that they'll need to do more than just show up in order to find love and be successful, and it's basically the first time ever where that's been true.
There have been generations where only 1 in every 13 males managed to reproduce for every female that passed on her genes. Women historically are the definition of "just exist" to be sexually successful. What you're complaining about was one of the first time that sexual equality in mating and reproduction was ever even approached.
Exactly. I don't understand why this and my earlier post with the same statement gets downvoted so much. This is so obvious that it can't be denied. Even today this is still true.
One thing I didn't see mentioned in the article (skimmed most of it) and rarely mentioned when this topic comes up is male rites of passage rituals. IMP its one of the main reasons modern men feel 'lost' as they become adults. Every culture had some type of multiple types of rituals where boys became men. You could argue that even decades ago when boys would enlist in the military they would come out as men, qualified as a rites of passage ritual.
Instead boys just turn 18 and then they are supposed to be men without anything that provides any real sort of guidance or idea of what it actually means to be a man. A lot of fathers have no idea how to instill this in their kids either if they are even around to teach it.
In ancient Greece, right of passage for men often meant sleeping with an older man who guided and mentored you. Were they real men? I'm not judging anyone's response - this is just to get some thinking a bit.
This is all quite simple to understand. Humans have been building an increasingly complex world around them - meanwhile biologically we haven't evolved at all to adapt to the madness. The latter is not possible in nature because we are hardwired to evolve very slowly. The former is only getting worse. That means we simply aren't naturally capable of dealing with the complexity. We are bombarded with a constant stream of stressors which destroy our mental, emotional and physical states daily. Our fight or flight mechanism gets triggered all the time and the resulting harmones wreak havoc on us. This was not the case in our early history. It's not that we are frail animals. It's that we are simply biologically fit for a different world than the one we live in. And the ship has sailed on the complexity factor, to the point that we are riding in a speeding vehicle without a driver. If anything, we are helpless contributing to making things worse.
So something has to give, and based on human history it's extremely unlikely that we will collectively go against our primitive intelligence and dumb down and de-stress our world so that we can live happier lives. We live in a massive comfort trap and we are addicts. Thus the only possible option for longer term survival is changing our biological states to cope... and that is exactly what we see attempted today. People have been chemically altering their states with drugs/medication. I'm not saying I agree with it and it may be a totally futile effort. I'm just explaining why we are so fkd as a species.
In conclusion, all this talk about the death of masculinity boils down to symptoms of the above. It goes for men and women - all humans. We were weak and scared destroyers of our world before and we continue to be now. If you plucked a baby from 250k years ago and raised them today they would be indistinguishable. The best thing we can all do embrace this reality, respect our limitations and try live a more honest life.
We're at an inflection point in human history. The earth is over populated and we're running out of water. Any day now some one will successfully weaponize AI. Women are putting themselves on the dating app meat markets and sacrificing their youth and beauty to formulaic serial dating strategies because that is smarter than having kids. Churches that promise earthly riches are doing great and the great traditions dismiss all true spiritual experiences as mental illness. The global housing market is in a bubble that makes 2007 look like a minor blip.
In this reality, of course young men are choosing to get lost in their screens and m*sturbate their lives away.
We're at an inflection point in human history. The earth is over populated and we're running out of water. Any day now some one will successfully weaponize AI. Women are putting themselves on the dating app meat markets and sacrificing their youth and beauty to formulaic serial dating strategies because that is smarter than having kids. Churches that promise earthly riches are doing great and the great traditions dismiss all true spiritual experiences as mental illness. The global housing market is in a bubble that makes 2007 look like a minor blip.
In this reality, of course young men are choosing to get lost in their screens and m*sturbate their lives away.
I don't think it's an inflection point - we've been at this self destruction since the beginning. There is just simply more addictive stuff now and we have easier access to it all. We are not stronger than all this cr@p that is constantly in our faces. In light of this, clearly we seem "weaker" than those before us, but it's simply not true.
We're at an inflection point in human history. The earth is over populated and we're running out of water. Any day now some one will successfully weaponize AI. Women are putting themselves on the dating app meat markets and sacrificing their youth and beauty to formulaic serial dating strategies because that is smarter than having kids. Churches that promise earthly riches are doing great and the great traditions dismiss all true spiritual experiences as mental illness. The global housing market is in a bubble that makes 2007 look like a minor blip.
In this reality, of course young men are choosing to get lost in their screens and m*sturbate their lives away.
I don't think it's an inflection point - we've been at this self destruction since the beginning. There is just simply more addictive stuff now and we have easier access to it all. We are not stronger than all this cr@p that is constantly in our faces. In light of this, clearly we seem "weaker" than those before us, but it's simply not true.
Hard times create strong men.
Strong men create good times.
Good times create weak men.
Weak men create hard times.
We're deep into a good times creating weak men cycle.
An idiot take made by an idiot on LR. Are you surprised?
Men aren't lost. They're just finally being confronted with the reality that they'll need to do more than just show up in order to find love and be successful, and it's basically the first time ever where that's been true.
This is a weird statement. To me it seems women always were the ones to just need to "show up" to find love.
Hahaha literally. To "find love" most women just need to not be fat, ugly, or be a total b!tch most of the time, and even then, many exceptions are made to this rule. Men are total simps and pushovers now, which is why you get delusional and entitled posts like this from karen.
As a practicing dominatrix, I so often come across men who lead a macho public life, yet they seek an outlet to be submissive or even humiliated. To be a MAN that the OP is talking about is to constantly be ON and ready for battle. That is not a healthy way to live and leads to a disregulated nervous system which actually leads to failed relationships. Men are not lost. I think more and more are feeling safer to be who they truly are and not try to fit in a box.