Wise Old Man:
I will use the team "biological male" since "boy" is not acceptable to you. I would like to continue this conversation so I will acquiesce.
I will answer your questions:
Is your daughter only happy if she wins?
No, she did go on to have a very successful HS and college career earning multiple first-team Division All-American. She didn't have a shot at winning those races but goals her goals were reached. Scholarships were earned, PRs run, so in your view, all's well that ends well. I don't think she would've been able to dedicate herself to a sport that didn't provide a fair playing field. As of now that field is still not fair in NCAA as you believe it should be, so when she did lose out to a biological male in HS she would just have to accept that it could happen again in college. Do you think there are no mental health aspects to this?
You are imagining a world in which suddenly there are 10 trans girls on your HS team and your daughter doesn’t make the varsity?
I wouldn't worry about her losing a spot on the varsity team to 10 boys, there were hardly 10 boys in our league that could beat her, states was a different story. For the team I coach now I would be very disappointed for the 7th girl on the team that did not get to run at states because she was displaced by a biological male. Not sure where you are going with numbers, I'm guessing as with age you have a certain threshold of how many biological males are allowed to compete with girls? You made 18 the age at which we can begin to tell a biological male he can not compete in the women's category. So if it was only my daughter who lost out on a title I shouldn't complain, I have to wait until there are enough girls affected?
As for my son losing his spot in a chorus, is there an advantage to being a woman when it comes to being a singer? You did acknowledge that males have physical advantages over females in sports, are you stating the same advantage for females with voice? I believe most of the successful singers in opera, Broadway, pop, rock, soul, rap are men. Taylor Swift is an example of this not being true but if you follow her career she has many times brought attention to different obstacles she had to overcome being a woman in a male-dominated industry.
Not sure why your position is "better" that we can allow certain biological males to compete with girls. Mine seems more consistent.