super cool guy wrote:
I tried to cheat once when I was in a distance relationship. I was drunk and on adderall and my gf had been acting like she didn’t want anything to do with me.
Meanwhile, she was going to meetups like “singles in the city” etc.
I felt pretty guilty about what I had done, but she was downright premeditated.
Anyway, very much easier for a woman to cheat in this day and age, and for that reason I’d guess they do it more often.
This sort of male fantasy (that women cheat and are more available for sex than they really are) is really quite dangerous. As a woman, I have one female friend who admitted to cheating, and that was because her then husband was cheating on her. Until he did that, she was faithful, then the marriage was breaking down and then they got divorced. Sometimes two people are married and one meets another person that they love more, and the marriage ends. This is a different kind of cheating to having multiple partners.
Its always been, theoretically speaking, easier for women to get a man than vice versa - women can just walk into a bar or meet someone on the street. In practice, very few women want casual sex, because its dangerous and can potentially result in them being raped, beaten up or killed, or at least treated badly. The idea that internet dating makes this easier is so far out that it can only come from someone who has done a lot of internet dating and has a skewed view of the world as a result. Most internet dating sites are struggling to attract enough women now.
I don't know if you've noticed, but women have significantly less testosterone than men and therefore less sex drive and less drive for casual sex.
I do however have many female friends who have been cheated on and who were genuinely devastated to be left for someone else, who have then been criticised for male acquaintencies for getting another boyfriend soon afterwards - double standards. But there are very, very few women who want casual sex - its just not a good option for women so if you know a number of these women, well then thats your decision making choices in life at play.
The idea that internet dating makes it more possible for women to cheat is so ridiculous - most women who have tried it have experienced the unwanted pictures and revolting strangers who to come round that night and talk about it with utter disgust. At least hook ups in a bar enable you to actually meet the person first, and I don't even know any women who do that outside their own circle of friends. Its something that nearly all my female friends talk about with nothing but horror and disgust, and the fact that you think its actually a thing makes you seem very, very weird with inappropriate boundaries.
Just because you know or have heard of one or two or three women behaving unusually, does not mean that all women behave like this. Same goes for men I guess. I'm pretty sure that my ex cheated multiple times and still cheats on his now wife, but he's unusually good looking and goes for less good looking women who are likely to be enthralled by his plastic charm and less likely to turn him down than an attractive women who has had to fend off unwanted male attention all her life. Whereas I would think that many men don't cheat and the ones that do, do so only occasionally where there is genuine attraction involved or the marriage has hit a bit of a rut. Even in the example you give, you have no proof that your girlfriend was actually cheating and it sounds like you were distancing and behaving poorly and not giving her any attention long before it got to this stage.
The unrealistic expectations of some men is unbelievable - and it really is not all men, but there are some true idiots out there for sure. There are more than a few men out there who just cannot listen when you say no - they still assume you like them. There are men who think just because you are walking down the street, you are there to find a man. Or if you do a certain activity without a man beside you, you are looking for a man. Its extremely tiresome.