Anyone else ever totally destroy a pizza buffet?

College Running D1

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6 years ago 06/10/2018 6:35pm EDT

re: fatties everywhere

fatties everywhere wrote:
Last time I went to a Golden Corral, I was shocked at all the fat people. I mean hugely fat. I was the only person in the building not over 200 lbs, and was one of only a handful not over 3 bills. It was disgusting.

I'm what you would call a "hobby jogger". I'm not ever going to be fast. I can still dunk a basketball though. I weigh in at 245lb but I don't think I'm fat. Ok, it helps that I spread that 245lbs out over my 6'9" frame.

Oh, and stop complaining about running shoes. Try finding running shoes (or any shoes) in a size 18.

6 years ago 06/10/2018 6:59pm EDT

re: Awsi Dooger

Awsi Dooger wrote:
big pig wrote:
I went to a Golden Corral yesterday for the first time in years, and I must agree, their pot roast is terrific. Easily the best item on their buffet.
Warning: their pizza is NASTY!
The desserts were hit or miss. Decent carrot cake, terrible brownies.
Good timing for this thread to be bumped. We're heading to Golden Corral tomorrow. I'll dominate a couple of plates of pot roast and green beans. Those are the best items on the menu, IMO. Also topped with some onion rings.
Pizza is indeed awful but I'm always a sucker for at least one slice. The meat loaf is hit and miss. Dressing is pretty good, with of without the accompanying turkey.
The brownies are poor but can be salvaged by placing the brownie on the bottom of an ice cream dish and then loading ice cream on top of the brownie, along with chopped nuts or other toppings. I always earn stares by how long and precise I can swirl the ice cream. Round and round. A half foot or taller.
People always want to believe I worked at an ice cream parlor at one point. Nope. It's just that the competition is so pathetic. Guys in particular can't swirl a cone worth a damn. They'll quit after one or two loops. Good hint: When buying a swirl ice cream cone always insist on a female employee to make it. She'll give you your money's worth.
Another tip at Golden Corral is to visit the website and sign up with your birthday. Every year they send you a free buffet coupon good within a week of your birthday. But it has to be used at a specific Golden Corral so make sure you pick one close to home. Tomorrow we are using one of those coupons. We have signed up multiple times using various names and email addresses. No apologies. I'm still adjusting away from comped buffets in Las Vegas.

You must report back tomorrow after your visit. Tell us how many plates of pot roast you packed away, how many yeast rolls you owned, how much carrot cake you downed, ect.

6 years ago 06/10/2018 8:06pm EDT

re: hungry hippo

Yes. Back in the day, I was through-hiking the Appalachian Trail somewhere in Virginia and went into a Pizza Hut with an all you can eat buffet. Was with a couple of other through hikers -- one had recently washed out of Seals/Buds and the other had played basketball for Marquette and was getting ready to go to officers training school. Everything washed down with pitchers of cheap beer. Who was going to quit eating first? A meal to remember.

6 years ago 06/10/2018 8:12pm EDT

re: Am I fatty too?

The only thing that gets destroyed in a pizza buffet is my butthole.

6 years ago 06/24/2018 2:09pm EDT

re: in awe

in awe wrote:
this thread is everything I love about letsrun.

I love how, in serious threads, there's poor writing, awful grammar, and spelling errors aplenty. In threads like this one, writing worthy of an English textbook appears, describing how people destroy buffets.

6 years ago 06/25/2018 8:53am EDT

re: Am I fatty too?

I can't consume more than 10 slices even after xc meets. Can you guys share your tips???

5 years ago 10/03/2018 8:57am EDT

re: hungry hippo

The process begins the day before with a water only fast. I stroll into the Golden Corral armed in full riot gear. I carry one of those plastic shovels that comes with a kid's toy bucket.

Occupying a center table, and giving dirty stares to anyone who cares to sit near me, I grab a plate and head to the buffet line. Returning to the table with a plate piled as high as my head, I sit and begin to shovel my face, making loud grunting noices with each bite.

After a dozen return trips, my table now resembling a city trash dump, and people staring in shock, I head to the bathroom. Pinwheeling and puking commence.

I return to my center table and start the process again.

5 years ago 03/07/2019 4:01pm EST

re: CHEESYCRUSTIE

CHEESYCRUSTIE wrote:
I can't consume more than 10 slices even after xc meets. Can you guys share your tips???

Go to CiCis after a big workout, and a lengthy fast. The thin crust at CiCis is the key to upping your number.

Life pro tip: Alternate between pizza and dessert. That way, just when management starts to get mad at your gluttony, they'll see you heading for the dessert bar and think you're almost done. Then head BACK to the pizza bar for another round. This can buy you 2-3 more trips to the buffet before getting kicked out.

5 years ago 03/07/2019 4:43pm EST

re: Python Dining Club

Python Dining Club wrote:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uso5FtigKo8 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dEIBE4Jw54

This is what clownpole looks like as eats his own words.

5 years ago 03/07/2019 7:00pm EST

re: hungry hippo

hungry hippo wrote:
I walk into the local pizza buffet, feeling confident. I pile plate after plate, using mad engineering skills to load each one as high as possible. Occupying a center table, I make obnoxious grunting noises as I shovel my pie hole with slice after slice. Making numerous return trips to the buffet line, my display of gluttony draws shocked and disgusted stares from employees and patrons alike. I also pass intermittent gas, possibly from the growing intestinal pressure, possibly because I am a disgusting swine.
Finally, breathing heavily and sweating profusely, I stagger to the men's room. I hold out my arms and begin to slowly pinwheel. The pizza starts to head back up until I am projectile vomiting, covering the walls, stall, sink, and floor. Tremendous relief sets it. I walk out feeling light and proud, although some gas continues to escape. I don't bother to clean up my little mess.
Then I walk to my car and drive straight to a Golden Corral.

This is like the anecdotes Renato Canova used to share, about the unknowns who would join his Kenyan thoroughbred stars on the hard long runs. The ones who hung for a day were couch ridden in days after, unable to return.

5 years ago 05/19/2019 11:35pm EDT

re: hungry hippo

hungry hippo wrote:
I walk into the local pizza buffet, feeling confident. I pile plate after plate, using mad engineering skills to load each one as high as possible. Occupying a center table, I make obnoxious grunting noises as I shovel my pie hole with slice after slice. Making numerous return trips to the buffet line, my display of gluttony draws shocked and disgusted stares from employees and patrons alike. I also pass intermittent gas, possibly from the growing intestinal pressure, possibly because I am a disgusting swine.
Finally, breathing heavily and sweating profusely, I stagger to the men's room. I hold out my arms and begin to slowly pinwheel. The pizza starts to head back up until I am projectile vomiting, covering the walls, stall, sink, and floor. Tremendous relief sets it. I walk out feeling light and proud, although some gas continues to escape. I don't bother to clean up my little mess.
Then I walk to my car and drive straight to a Golden Corral.

ill! Yuck you eat pizza just to throw up!

5 years ago 05/19/2019 11:42pm EDT

re: Cathy loves to run 14

Cathy loves to run 14 wrote:
ill! Yuck you eat pizza just to throw up!

You think that is silly? When I was a little kid, me and my friends got into a little water drinking competition. We challenged each other, cup after cup of water. I drank so much water I actually puked water. That was really weird.

5 years ago 05/20/2019 12:11am EDT

re: BergLaufer

BergLaufer wrote:
Cathy loves to run 14 wrote:
ill! Yuck you eat pizza just to throw up!
You think that is silly? When I was a little kid, me and my friends got into a little water drinking competition. We challenged each other, cup after cup of water. I drank so much water I actually puked water. That was really weird.

Dude, that can actually kill you, it's called hypervolemia I think.

5 years ago 05/20/2019 2:21am EDT

re: hungry hippo

most I've eaten in a sitting was 24 slices. never had any problems keeping it down.

5 years ago 05/20/2019 2:59am EDT

re: Radical CJ

Radical CJ wrote:
most I've eaten in a sitting was 24 slices. never had any problems keeping it down.

What! My average is 1 or 2 slices!

5 years ago 05/20/2019 8:27pm EDT

re: Cathy loves to run 14

Cathy loves to run 14 wrote:
Radical CJ wrote:
most I've eaten in a sitting was 24 slices. never had any problems keeping it down.
What! My average is 1 or 2 slices!

You have to dream big to eat big.

5 years ago 05/20/2019 8:40pm EDT

re: hungry hippo

But it's pizza. No pizza is that good to blow up your gut.

5 years ago 06/24/2019 2:13pm EDT

re: Moo Goo

Timely thread. I went to Golden Corral for breakfast on Saturday. I ate so many pancakes, each drowning in syrup, that I was hurting the rest of the day. I had horrible diahrrea the next day. That was smelly.

5 years ago 06/24/2019 2:24pm EDT

re: golden corral gary

Every single time I eat pizza, I have a explosive dump on my run the next day. Should I be concerned?

5 years ago 06/24/2019 4:08pm EDT

re: hungry hippo

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