What is the weirdest, most unexplained thing you've seen running?

That UFO story (the Loch Ness one) is bullshit. How can you have an alien abduction without an anal probe! ALL aliens probe anuses! That's what the DO! Sheesh!

(in fact, in anticipation of the anal probe part, I had begun masterbating to your story. When there was no anal probe, my member became flaccid and I got a bad case of blue balls. THANKS TO YOU)

I once saw a squirrel with a boner running through the EMU campus. The squirrel was reputedly 40 years old but, somehow still had eligibility thanks to the space aliens that run the NCAA clearinghouse. It stopped several times in a nearby park to have sex with senior citizens, skin some opossums, and set a car on fire.

And out comes the man from Mars

And you try to run but he's got a gun

And he shoots you dead and he eats your head

And then you're in the man from Mars

You go out at night eating cars

You eat Cadillacs Lincolns too

Mercurys and Subaru

And you don't stop

You keep on eating cars

Then when there's no more cars you go out at night

And eat up bars where the people meet

Face to face

Dance cheek to cheek

One to one

Man to man

Dance toe to toe

Don't move too slow 'cause the man from Mars is through with cars

He's eating bars

Yeah wall to wall

Door to door

Hall to hall

He's gonna eat 'em all

Rapture

Be pure

Take a tour through the sewer

Don't strain your brain

Paint a train

You'll be singing in the rain

Said don't stop to the punk rock

back to back, body muscular spinless movement, bite the jugular

one to one (huh?)technology

And a (say what?) ardour, no sign of saviour in Rapture

Well now you see what you wanna be

Just have your party on TV

'Cause the man from Mars won't eat up bars where the TV's on

And now he's gone back up to space where he won't have a hassle

with the human race

And you hip hop

And you don't stop

Just blast off sure shot

Because the man from Mars stopped eating cars

And eating bars

And now he only eats guitars

Portland is alive and well -ha!

Let me get this straight...a team full of guys had a good laugh watching a fellow male teammate run through campus with a boner? Huh, you midwestern boys are a little different...

PR, that damn squirrel snuck into Bowen Fieldhouse during the track meet Saturday, dashed across the long jump, high jump and shot put areas before hiding under the pole vault pits. One of the USATF suits/officials tried to get it out by citing rules violations but the rat-family critter just showed its fangs and hissed.

Portland Runner wrote: I once saw a squirrel with a boner running through the EMU campus. The squirrel was reputedly 40 years old but, somehow still had eligibility thanks to the space aliens that run the NCAA clearinghouse. It stopped several times in a nearby park to have sex with senior citizens, skin some opossums, and set a car on fire.[/quote]

When 92 year old Kermit Ambrose started the 60m dash, the sound of the gun scared the aroused squirrel so that it sped under the announcing area and into the path of the auto timing beam where it vaporized. Boaz was eating pizza at the table and can attest to the whole incident. I kid you not.

Anybody ever heard "The Mississippi Squirrel Revival" by Ray Stevens? Very funny and appropriate song for this thread.

Once saw a dead body face down in the Hudson River mudflats while warming up for a track meet. He had a gunshot/stab wound in the back, and was either very fat or very bloated. The cops couldnt get to him because the mud was too thick to walk through. They just waited until the tide came in and fished him out with a raft. Amazing how only 20 minutes after seeing a dead guy, you can toe the line and be completely focused on a race.

By the way, does EMU still have that tower near one of its entrances that looks like a giant phallis? Driving by there on the way to the Huron Relays each year was kind of a watershed moment for me.

This is getting too good...a squirrel w/a boner and a water tower that looks very much like a supersized penis on the EMU campus. Yes, ds-man, the TOWER is still there. In all its glory. Right across the street from the oldest student union in the USA where Boaz studies for geography exams and eats fast food. Fast food is a pun.

The giant penis and union are about 7 miles down the road from the former home of AWebb...not to be confused w/CWebb who's caused that other college much embarrassment in recent weeks. That other college hosts something called the Naked Mile just before finals week in the spring. It's my understanding that AWebb decided after the Naked Mile and well before the NCAA 1500m to leave UM. Seems roomy Nate B stuck it to him in the NM and AWebb knew his time as BMOC was about up (or down?).