HELP: MARATHON WITH GIRLFRIEND

I once ran a marathon with a gf. just to warn you ~ it was more painful than running sub4.

Like most others here, I would suggest paying the entry fee if you plan to run the entire race with her. That way you CAN take water, cross the finish line, etc., and not feel guilty about it, because you KNOW you did the right thing. I've paced people during races for a mile or two (or sometimes a little more), but never an entire race without paying, and I never took anything from the race. Since it's her first marathon, she's gonna want you there with her on the backside of the finish line. (Remember how great you felt when you finished your first one ?) If you don't care about your time, or don't want your time recorded, just don't wear your chip and there'll be no record of you being there at all.

For someone running a four hour marathon, Galloway probably isn't a bad program. As much as I think the message he sends is hypocritical, it's not bad for people who are going to be out there for that long. Walk breaks aren't a bad thing if you're more interested in finishing than setting a PR.

To encourage her when the going gets rough, just keep talking to her about how great she's doing (even if she's not), telling her she CAN do it, reminding her about running with good form, and encourage her to run with little packs of people. Say things like "Hey, let's stay with these guys, they look strong." Just keep telling her to work together with the people around her. Mainly, just say things that are positive ...

Good Luck !!

Don't most marathons have pace groups for those shooting for a Boston Qualifier? What do you think of those?

the grump wrote:

How do you all have the energy to worry about these little things? Are you are worried about every car you see speeding, every kid under 21 that has a drink, every waitress that doesn't declare her tips to the IRS? Yes they are all wrong, but I would go nuts if I worried about every little transgression.

My advice - chill. Enjoy the fact that this guy is helping a new runner enjoy the sport and being a supportive partner in the process.

If someone saw a 4 hour bandit in a marathon and came here to start a thread about it and complain, I'd also tell them to chill and not worry about other people's small wrongdoings. If a beginner or someone who is only concerned with fun and fitness made the mistake of banditry or broke some minor race rule, the race director should nicely ask them to not do it again and pay for their entry next time, and give them a second chance and others should mind their own business.

But when an experienced runner knowingly bandits (or plans to bandit) a race and announces it on letsrun, the flaming he gets is the flaming he deserves.

who the hell cares?? if someone is helping your competitor then why not roll with them and out kick her ftw in front of her significant other?... how satisfying would that be? i would personally love to see someone jump in and do that to someone i was racing (not that it would ever happen). i would be so motivated to beat that person it would be great.

yetanotherchick wrote: But when an experienced runner knowingly bandits (or plans to bandit) a race and announces it on letsrun, the flaming he gets is the flaming he deserves.

Don't pay the entry fee, drink all the water/sportsdrink you can, and take as many gels as you can carry/stuff in your pockets for future use.

I could go either way on crossing the finish line.

Pete wrote:...I'm OK with being flamed about this. ...

For info, the first one, I ran the last 7-8 miles of a 4:40 effort (with permission). Second race, I ran the entire 4:13ish. Last time (when I was a registered participant in a shorter race and couldn't have registered for and run the marathon), I ran the second half of a 3:52. That one was close to a Boston qualifier. I might feel a little more guilty if I'd aided her to a BQ time.

The only one I feel sorta bad about is the middle one. Still, and I know this bothers some of you, I didn't lose any sleep over my crime.

swider wrote:

dude, no way don't register for the race. you're a 2:40's guy, you dont want people to search your name and see that 4 hour marathon in the results. just stick with her and be supportive. she'll think you're such a stallion.

You can take care of this concern while keeping things honest: pay, but don't wear your chip. Then no time will be recorded. But bear in mind that a lot of faster runners enter races w/ SO's who are slower so as to encourage/pace them. Those who respect you and your running won't stop respecting either just because you're using one race to cheerlead.

You don't need to say a whole lot. Sometimes it's good just to have someone's company and 26.2 miles is a long way to carry on a steady conversation.

Good luck to you both (you in your effort to provide support, her in her first marathon!)

Pete wrote:

Pete wrote:...I'm OK with being flamed about this. ...

For info, the first one, I ran the last 7-8 miles of a 4:40 effort (with permission). Second race, I ran the entire 4:13ish. Last time (when I was a registered participant in a shorter race and couldn't have registered for and run the marathon), I ran the second half of a 3:52. That one was close to a Boston qualifier. I might feel a little more guilty if I'd aided her to a BQ time.

The only one I feel sorta bad about is the middle one. Still, and I know this bothers some of you, I didn't lose any sleep over my crime.

I don't understand why everyone is fixated on Pete's banditing, when they should be slamming him for ENABLING his wife. JEEZ. Tell her to MAN UP like everyone else.

This is why a woman will never be president....they can never do anything without a partner for moral support.

JEEZ.

agree with you 100%

silly old fossil wrote:

they should be slamming him for ENABLING his wife. JEEZ. Tell her to MAN UP like everyone else. *SHE* can never do anything without a partner for moral support.

JEEZ.

silly old fossil wrote: I don't understand why everyone is fixated on Pete's banditing, when they should be slamming him for ENABLING his wife. JEEZ. Tell her to MAN UP like everyone else.

silly old fossil wrote:

I don't understand why everyone is fixated on Pete's banditing, when they should be slamming him for ENABLING his wife. JEEZ. Tell her to MAN UP like everyone else.

This is why a woman will never be president....they can never do anything without a partner for moral support.

JEEZ.

Hello? I was in a race in which nearby a woman was coaching and cajoling the guy, so it goes both ways!

How do you know he doesn't feel the need for his wife's company and if so, what's wrong with that? His wife might in fact be someone a lot of fun to be with. So he has good taste in his choice of female companions--congrats, I say!

Also, not every woman needs a guy to run with her during a race.

My bf and I tend to like to do our own thing during races and meet up at the end--and honestly, I don't think either of us are the best company for each other during a marathon. (Hmm... I guess this contradicts my other post, but not entirely. I can enjoy bf's company during a run, just I figure we're both better off on our own for racing. I like to be able to encourage as well as need encouragement, and running with someone holding back for me would feel too one-sided.)

But for some couples the racing together thing works. t'weech her/his own.

The difference between right and wrong? Consequences? Seriously? Please explain the horrible affects that pacing my friend in his 50k last weekend brought onto the other runners? Also let me know what bad consequences could come out of the original poster pacing his girlfriend for part of her first marathon.

And I think that correlating my salary to my apparent lack of moral compass is a completely asinine comment. One could argue (without refute) that there are plenty of people who make money hand over fist who have no regard for right and wrong (think Ken Lay or Jeff Skilling).

You are an idiot.

And no it was not good weather. It was cold as balls.

??????? wrote:

Who said anything about your situation?

With your reading comprehension level, I can see why you made 9 grand last year. And if you did only make 9 grand last year, you should spend less time on letsrun and running races and more time making a living.

You made 9 grand last year, and you are telling someone else they are out of touch with reality?

1) I am not sure why my reading comprehension should be called into question. The poster assumes that $100 for a race should be no problem. One hundred dollars is a big deal for some people. That was the point I was trying to make using my situation as an example.

2) I spend a few minutes a day looking at the front page of letsrun every couple of days for news. This thread was featured on the front page so I checked it out. And I don't run races very often because I can't afford too many of them.

3) The reason I made $9,000 last year certainly has nothing to do with my reading ability (or lack thereof). The first few months of the year were spent finishing a master's degree (I was an unpaid GA). I worked part-time in retail and after I didn't find a job immediately in my field, I decided to continue with my retail job for a little while. Meanwhile, my girlfriend was planning to attend graduate school so I figured we'd just wait for me to get a "real" job until we moved to whatever city we landed in. Come to find out, living off of a meager wage is a good exercise in wise budgeting and redefining priorities. I also have lots of time to do things I enjoy in life and a lot fewer headaches.

So ???????, I suspect your comments had less to do with the original poster's conundrum and more to do with making fun of me. Thanks for being an asshole.

Hey man, I just did the same thing with my gf back in October. To begin with, she already appreciates that you are making the effort for her, no worries there. My gf was just a casual runner and then started training with Team In Training, a noble cause I might say, and she really had the whole thing planned out, she did run the entire thing and squeaked in just under 4 hours up at the Nike Women's Marathon in S.F. I ran a good majority of it, and only pieces with her. I would say I got in about 16mi on the day and did everything I could to help her out. I carried her longsleeve shirt when she was done with it (it was actually mine anyway, so no big deal there) Also I was at certain spots to cheer her on and take pictures. The spots I was at were the 10mi mark where I ran a nice easy paced 2mi with her then let her go for a bit as it made a horseshoe back to me at mile 16 and ran another 2mi with her as the course was doing another horseshoe. I waited patiently for her to come up to the 24mi mark and started to jog in with her (holding hands I might add, not necessary, but she loved it, as did everyone running by who was saying "thats a keeper.") Basically they just want to know that you are there for them, take a look at the map ahead of time, show her that you care. L.A. is nice because there are short cuts one can take, if you want to venture onto the "mean streets" of downtown L.A., jk about that I learned to run on those streets in HS. In answer to your questions, don't pay fee, don't sacrifice training, walking breaks don't need to happen unless she feels it necessary or comfortable to do so. A way to get her mind off is just talking to her if she wants it, give her company and she'll be happy that you are there. Have patience, you didn't get to running in college and a 2:48 marathon over night! As far as startline and finish don't worry about them, it is a mob at the startline and no one cares if you have a bib or not, especially in the back, they wont know the difference. at the finish let her cross the line alone, this is her marathon not yours, wait for her at the end of the chute, you'll be greeted by a sweaty, exhausted, but jubilant woman! Enjoy your time in LA make it exciting and fun! Best Wishes to you both!

in a major race like the LA marathon, you'd probably get yelled at or told to get off the course if you don't have a number.

Just talking to her, not expecting her to talk back helps take pain and time away. Tell a story about work or something like a crazy story that happened to you that she will find bizarre. or unreal.

Let her get her own water. Do not tend to her every need. She should feel like she did this, and that you were just there to be as a visible support not a support that she felt she "needed". Therefore, you can create a future plan of you both going to a marathon, and you both run - i.e. Disney or New Orleans, etc.

Did you tell her it was best to do some training "down the dirt road"

Not

rr wrote:

in a major race like the LA marathon, you'd probably get yelled at or told to get off the course if you don't have a number.

not true, I have actually run on the course bib-less and been fine, no big deal there.