Falling for a single mom! My family is not having it.

If you think you need your parent's permission on who you date at 25 then you are not mature enough to raise kids yet. No marriage is easy and starting out with kids makes it tougher but not impossible. I was not in this situation but my parents were aware enough I would just cut off contact if they tried to control my life decisions.

Flagpole wrote:

I never am on the wrong side of things.

President Hillary disagrees with you.

Parents are correct on this one . This is the example , if you are on a "tiny teen " adult web site and you go hummm , then you see a real tiny teen and it is not good . Real always wins .

How Soon We Forget wrote:

Flagpole wrote:

I never am on the wrong side of things.

President Hillary disagrees with you.

Nope! I said Trump couldn't cheat, and he cheated. FELONY campaign finance law violation.

LRC VIP BFD wrote:

F#ck your judgmental, conditionally loving family. You're 25, do what makes the most sense to you.

^This is CORRECT!

Leroy Jenkins that relationship and don’t look back. Eff the haters and run headlong into her arms.

25? 2 kids and unmarried? Duuuude. Listen to the parents on this one.

Don’t go for sloppy seconds. Back out of this now.

Certainly at least one other didn't back out in time.

Some posters think you are foolish O.P. Some posters don't like your father. Logically, the woman you are dating must be better looking than most of the other females you have dated and most logically, this female with kids tries harder to please you. You won't be the first man to marry a woman with kids. Do what you want to do. Do know, just because you don't like the way your father communicated to you does not make your father incorrect. Again, we know this woman is better looking than any woman who has given you attention. I cannot say that doesn't matter.

Your family shouldn’t matter. Eventually your parents will die and you’ll be alone and unhappy thinking about the one you passed up on because they told you. Remember, it’s your life to live. If they voluntarily choose to cut you out of their life, that’s their choice. Focus on your living your life to the fullest.

The main thing to consider with the mom of two is are you willing to accept the kids as your own? You’re essentially signing up to be a dad, right now. You can’t half @ss it. The kids will grow attached and see you as a dad. If you’re just looking for fun for a year or two, you’ll break the kids hearts. And that’s more important than the mom. Also, having two kids means you can’t do things you might want to do. Like travel. You can’t do fun spontaneous date things with the mom, like wake up Friday morning and say, f it let’s go here and there this weekend. You have to plan ahead. And of course the financial part. Going out with the family - mom and two kids - is more expensive. A dinner and movie date means you are eating at a kid friendly restaurant and watching a kid friendly movie, and it’ll at least cost twice as much. If the mom is the independent type she will volunteer to pay for at least the kids, but eventually, as I said before, you’re the dad so the expectation would be you treat them as your kids.

Obviously if you’re ok with all of that then go ahead. The key is think ahead and think long term. Essentially if you aren’t willing to marry her, don’t get involved.

OP, I've seen this movie before. My buddy was just like you except he's 37. Fell for a single mom with a kid. They were all lovey dovey and posted photos of all of their dates on Facebook. Kept showing off about how in love they were of each other. After they dated for 6 months, 3 of us planned a boys trip. He decides to bring his gf and we rolled our eyes. The very next day, they broke up. They had an argument because my buddy didn't agree with something with her son. A single guy with no kids can't tell a mother how to raise her kid. They are just at different stages of life.

You're freaking 25 man. In 5 years you'll be a completely different person. No offense but it sounds like you haven't had much dating experience. Listen to your parents.

Flagpole wrote:

Tell your parents, and especially your Dad to f*ck off.

So if your son told you he was going to marry Sha'carri Richardson (let's pretend she has 2 kids), and they get married and your grandchildren grow up to be just like her - and he tells you to f*ck off, you'd be cool with that?

bruhhhhhhh wrote:

I have a great connection w/ a gal I’ve been seeing for a few months(7). We’re both 25. She’s a single mom of 2, independent, and co-parents happily w/ her ex.

I wasn’t bothered by the single mom status but my family is giving me a big pushback & has not talked to me since I told them about her. They’re extremely conservative & basically gave me an ultimatum. Dads big speech went along the lines of “you’re dishonoring the family, there are many women w/ no kids, keep search, etc.”

I love my family but I also really like this girl. I think they’d really like her if they gave her a chance. What would you do if you’re in my shoes?

Just be friends & date other single women with no kids! I was in long-term relationship with a single momy x 2 way back in the late 90s when I was your age. Though we had a "connection," it was a disaster and it was scary to think that we were very close to getting married. After the break up, I was depressed for awhile because I didn't think I could find anyone as attractive as her. Well...a couple years later, I met a beautiful woman who was divorced but no kids. We had a great connection and got married after a year of dating, had some kids & now we're growing old together.

Your only hope here is a pump and dump. Good luck

Be glad hour family gave you an ultimatum. Now go live your life.

This answer is clear and correct.

Walk away and live your life, not the life of the guy that was there before you.

hobbyjogger1 wrote:

Be glad hour family gave you an ultimatum. Now go live your life.

No, this is the answer that's clear and correct. Be a boy and do what your parents say, or be a man and tell your parents what you'll do. Make it clear that you're not interested in their ill-informed advice on this issue.