Help me invest!!!!!

I have never been let down investing in weed beer and rubbers HEY OH

My favorite investor, Jim Rogers, says to only invest in what you know about.

If Trump had invested his small $1 million dollar loan in the 70's in an stock index fund he would be worth 13 billion now versus the supposed 2-3 billion (which I doubt since he lies about everything).

Also gold isn't that bad as long as you can put up with the downswings.

http://performance.morningstar.com/funds/etf/total-returns.action?t=GLD

Since Trump is going to blow up the deficit either should work.

Since interest rates are going up, you want to invest major cash in bonds

Make The Dollar Worth More wrote:

Why don't you invest in the Dollar? Shouldn't it go up if MAGA works?

Think I saw last week the dollar went up almost 2% in a single day! Trump is creating havoc in the currency market too.

run with the wom wrote:

If Trump had invested his small $1 million dollar loan in the 70's in an stock index fund he would be worth 13 billion now

Doubtful... $1M to $13B over 40 years would be 26% per year

jamin wrote:

dasfasdf wrote:

Is this an investment you plan to sit on for many years?

No, I will sell as soon as these stocks reach their previous highs, then will buy whatever other stocks are on sale at that time.

I imagined you as somebody who was financially well-versed. I guess not.

1. Timing the market is a recipe for disaster; the capital gains taxes that you incur when trying to time the market makes it so that you'd have to be the best investor in the history of the world to beat long-term investing. Don't do it.

2. For the vast majority of investors, a low expense-ratio index fund such as Vanguard's of Fidelity's index funds is best. A "one-stop" shop fund that I'd recommend is Vanguard's total stock market index. The S and P 500 captures only a smaller section of the market and would need to be supplemented with other funds.

3. If you do invest in individual funds, read several books from Warren Buffet, the Motley Fool, or even "idiots guide to stocks, etc."

4. Don't invest money you cannot lose. If I were you I'd max out my ROTH IRA/IRA/ROTH IRA retirement accounts.

5. Have an emergency fund that can cover 3-6 months of living expenses should you lose your job or have an emergency.

6. Not related to investing but please stop being a beta male and just fr--in ask women out instead of bitching about them. You are WELCOME.

Happy to just as soon as you drop the "beta male" language which is basically 6th grade level bloviations. Try to talk (and post) like an adult.

1. Open an etrade account, scottrade, etc...

2. Look for companies that have gone down a lot recently, but have a history of being much higher.

3. Buy the dip

4. When it rebounds in a couple days sell.

5. Laugh at people that invest in index funds.

I've started doing this and I'm already up over 10% this week.

TAA wrote:

1. Open an etrade account, scottrade, etc...

2. Look for companies that have gone down a lot recently, but have a history of being much higher.

3. Buy the dip

4. When it rebounds in a couple days sell.

5. Laugh at people that invest in index funds.

I've started doing this and I'm already up over 10% this week.

LOL

10/10

Thank you TAA. I will adjust my holdings accordingly.

HardLoper wrote:

Thank you TAA. I will adjust my holdings accordingly.

A wise move, sir.

2. Look for companies that have gone down a lot recently, but have a history of being much higher.

Find companies that are near insolvency or bankruptcy...

What are your investment goals? Are they as sketchily defined as your relationship goals?

janim wrote:

Happy to just as soon as you drop the "beta male" language which is basically 6th grade level bloviations. Try to talk (and post) like an adult.

Shut up, cuck.

you're a tranny lover wrote:

janim wrote:

Happy to just as soon as you drop the "beta male" language which is basically 6th grade level bloviations. Try to talk (and post) like an adult.

Shut up, cuck.

Shut your pie hole you ball-less shit-for-brains.

Whenever I need to make some cash I pump and dump Clean Coal Technology -- CCTC.

Currently at a low, it will surge BIGLY with the impending Trump takeover.

https://finance.yahoo.com/quote/CCTC?p=CCTC

I just practiced talking in Carl Icahn's accent. Am I an investor now?

jamin wrote:

Sage Advice wrote:

Invest in gold. Heavily. You won't regret it.

Alan Greenspan, is that you?

Not since the 1960s, the old Ayan Rand days, when Greenspan told the truth.